Lovin' Tater Tots

Half-hearted apologies for yesterdays video of Spud. I find all things Spud fascinating so it's hard to push the edit button. The good news is no one is forced to hit play. Gotta love that!

I do find that little Spud-Muffin the center of everything. When he wraps those little arms around my neck and clings to my waist with his strong little legs tears mostly always squirt out of my eyes. If that feeling could be packaged and marketed there would never be need for any type of depression medication. Who can feel sadness when someone that adorable, tiny, and dependent on you looks at you and loves you that way. I swoon.

Spud loves to vacuum. I'm kinda serious. Do you love the plaid jumpsuit?

Squeeze!

No agenda today. Just lovin' on my little Tater, lovin' on my Pups, and lovin' that yesterday felt like Monday and it was actually Friday! Score!

A Post a Day Keeps the Januaryitis Away

That's what I'm thinking. I'm writing every day this month just to see. Some of you may want to look away. It could get mesmerizing, oops, I might have meant, mortifying.

I weighed myself a few minutes ago and I was neither horrified nor satisfied! Which means I'm the same and that seems like a New Year Celebration right there. No damage! I am dancing in the form of walking lunges right now. Because, like it or not, January First is a good time to reinforce improvements.

January Pledges

• Write more.
• Read more.
• Laugh more. 
• Stop stressing out about people that you don't even like. Address and dismiss girl. They're fine where they are. Leave them there.
• But be nicer. Guess what? It's nice to be nice. Today was day one - Nice!
• Allow no doldrums this month. No, the sun probably won't shine, but who cares! Life is fantastic! The so-exciting-I-might-pee parts and the it's-Tuesday-and-I-get-to-watch-RHOBH parts. All good. 
• Deep as a puddle can be entertaining, but maybe only to you.
• Chubby and aged is prized in some cultures. You might want to move there! hehehe
• To fight sadness about the above, remember the lovely doctor that repeatedly hit on you during Pup's stay a couple of months ago. Took me until hit #3 to get it. #notverybright #somelikeityourway #itdidtakemymindoffwhatwashappening #deepasapuddle 
• See above and alleviate the #deepasapuddleitis you can have. Find meaning.
• With this thought, leave the hashtags to others. You are annoying more than just yourself.  :)
• Again, with this said, never give up your mad love for the emoticon. Some things are classic. Plonk!

It's a beginning. 

Did You Hear That?

A few weeks ago we went with the kids to get our tree as we do every year. This was Spud's second year getting a tree, but he was way more excited about it this year. Although it was hard to tell with everything he had on.

:)

The Big B and Bella picked their tree and Pup and I picked ours. The guy from the tree spot made fresh cuts on our stumps so the trees would drink water and then he tied them onto The Captain.

The Little Family decided not to go out to eat with us so Pup and dropped them and their tree off at their house and we traveled on our way to a local place that makes the best chicken wild rice soup with a broth base. Lovely on a chilly evening.

As we're heading onto a ramp we hear a "shush" sound. We look at each other.

"What was that?" I say. "Did you hear something?"

Pup looks out of the rear view mirror. There is our tree laying in the middle on the ramp.

What??

We back up The Captain to the dismay of the two cars that are trying to swing along the ramp.

We good-naturedly cuss them out. You know, no one ever drives as good as you do on the road yes? That's how we cuss, I mean, drive, around these parts. Lots of cussing. Lots of finger-waving. Lots of judging. I mean, who would beep at us just because we're backing up on an onramp? I ask the question!

The poor little tree. What if we hadn't heard that "shush?" We would have gone for soup, come back out, and surely thought someone had stolen our tree in a most non-Christmas way.

Oh the laughter. Oh the tears from the laughter.

Shaky! 

How you undecorating?

Well . . . Do They?

Last Night . . .

Pup and I were out on the deck enjoying a lovely evening and contemplating giving George a walk about in the neighborhood. He turned to me and said, "Hey - you know that twitch I get in my head the last few times we had sex? Let's go see if it happens again."

First I snorted because that man makes me laugh! Then I shot him a look and said, "That's it? That's the sweet-talking you use to get to me?"

He started laughing and holding his supposedly twitching forehead said, "You really should be writing about this stuff. I'm gold! Pure gold!"

The man thinks highly of himself! I told him I was very glad that someone does.  ;)

I won't finish the story, but I bet it goes where you wouldn't imagine it goes.

And it got me wondering why I am not writing? Don't I have plenty to say still? Oh I do! If you can take it, I can make it.

Around here in Chez Emerson-land it's been busy as everyone is busy. Doing this and that. Going here and there. I watch the Spud (darling grandson) a few days a week and I do have to admit that I am his favorite Gigi. Only because his other grandma goes by Grandma. Although I do whisper in his ear every time I see him, "Gigi is your favorite right Spud?" He favors me with his two-toofums and contemplates me with eyes I remember his momma contemplating me with back when she was 7.5 months. It's eerie and wonderful. It makes me stare at him on the daily if I have him.

He and I walk around the neighborhood. Spud in a stroller and me clutching the handles and looking at him while he reclines in his seat. His chubby thighs exposed and in the air. He swings his little legs and looks all around the neighborhood while we are moving. I make him wear a hat and while he moves his head the hat becomes askew. I stop frequently to fix it. Rather compulsively. I wonder if he'll remember any of these times we spend together. If he'll remember how he listens so seriously to Hop on Pop. I know he won't, but I feel blessed, yes BLESSED to be watching him right now.

I delight when his daddy drops him off and when he hears and sees me his sweet little face breaks out into the hugest grin. Sheesh I've become a maudlin and mushy person. At least with him. Maybe with others I've become a huger pain the ass. But we won't talk about that! Heh!

George loves that baby. Even though lots of Spud's toys squeak and some even look like one of George's toys, he never, ever touches one.

I'm certain it's way too early, but Spud's hair is taking on a ginger-look. His great-grandma (my momma) had red hair and it isn't out of the realm of possibility his could be red. We'll see. It changes on the daily. His eyes have settled into the beautiful gray blue of his daddy's eyes.

There are other things going on around here, but this is foremost on the mind today. Who knows what will be in that cavern tomorrow?

Thug Life

The Spud Club

 I play

I relax

Do I Need a Cleanse?

March 5

It's only March 5th.

Around here much winter is still left.

I'm so tired of my knee boots I want to toss them. They'll be ready to be tossed since they look like crap with all the salt and wet they pick up daily. Blech . . .

My coats look like crap. No matter what natty scarf I put with them they look like crap. I'm not feeling particularly natty.  :)

My chub layer of winter protection is particularly chubby this season. My jeans are snug. My hair dank and listless. My eyes watery and vacant.

Don't I sound pretty? Heh!

It's bleak and dreary, snowy and frosty, cold and blustery. My poor dog George (AmStaff) is a constant pain in the ass. He can't really go outdoors for long as he has very short fur. After five minutes or so his little paws are being lifted and he's shivering like crazy. He thinks he'd love to be out there, but after a couple of turns around the block he's ready to go home. And this is only if I haven't killed myself with the slippin' and sliddin' that I'm doing in my freaking BOOTS!

The kitties are making me insane. See the lamp in the photo in my header? Gone. The baby-kitty broke it. This is the second lamp he has broken. I cried and screamed like my heart was broken as well. It's not. But that lamp was incroyablement frays and I nearly cannot look at my header any longer. :(

Whew . . .

I even went shopping over the weekend with a friend and it bored me to tears. SHOPPING people! I love shopping!

I am laughing a little bit right now. Always when I write my complaints out I feel better. Y'all might be depressed now, but I feel better! It's not fair is it?

Looking Forward

1. A pedicure. One of those always make me feel like Havaianas are not far from my everyday life. I'll scope out my new pair for the season. Should I get the color of the sun?
2. A new handbag. Something lovely and statement-making. I won't even mention what I'm eyeballing because I'll get pounded with handbag-hate. (Givenchy)  Oooops! I said it.
3. Decorating the former Den. I'm thinking and thinking. It's now dual-duty with the Spud (grand baby) so it needs to be a little bit baby and a little bit guest. I'll figure out something. Maybe. And I have to stop calling it the den. The desk is long gone.
4. I have started a new protocol with a new doctor for some of my issues - insomnia being one. And all the bad things that go along with insomnia. I'm entering week three. I see some progress and will report what happens by week six when I see him again. Let's just say I am feeling hopeful and happy.
5. I'm looking forward with a happiness that is unbridled to taking Spud for walks when spring arrives. He and I will have the best summer. This city is full of beautiful lakes and I want to stroll about with the most beautiful boy and have everyone fawn all over him. His smile will light up all worlds! Is that overstated just a bit? Hell no!  :)
6. Pup and I are considering Jamaica for our April trip. Negril's beach looks like the place for a lovely, relaxing time. My new doc said to get my arse in the SUN! I have no desire to disobey for once.

Aaaaaaah! I'm purged! It's good. 

How are you guys coping this long winter season? New haircuts? New purchases? New resolves? Scratch those itches bitches!

The Spud Club

15 weeks

Do a Little Dance

Make a little love.

I keep calling the grand-spud KD the Sunshine Boy. Then this song spring into my mind. Remember them? KC and the Sunshine Band?

Get down tonight.

I think I saw them in concert back back.

Little KD the Sunshine Boy

He looks a little bemused here yes? He had just woken up from a nice long sleepy-byes and I took this shot to send to his momma and I captioned it, "Momma, my pants are too small."

Sometimes he looks at me with his little eyes that look so much like his momma's little eyes when she was a baby. He looks at me and I can see he's thinking. I read a story to him yesterday and I swear he was listening intently.

February

My least favorite month. Which really means a change should come. Make the change!

Our loft bedroom has a wall of windows on the southern end. It gets warm and toasty up there and most days the three furry pets hang up there soaking in the sun. It makes you happy even if you fight it! Powerful thing the sun.

Baby, let's get together 
Honey hush, me and you 
And do the things 
Ah, do the things 
That we like to do 
Oh . . .

Do a little dance!

Happy People

Here I am!
Signed, sealed, delivered,
I'm yours!
~Stevie Wonder

Ha!

Are y'all thinking about the past year? Thinking about what the coming year could mean? Changes yes?

I read an article a few minutes ago (and promptly Pinterested it -yeah, I said it!) about the things that happy people do differently. One of the things was be in the moment.

It sounds so simple. Aren't we all in that moment? I mean, I'm there aren't I? How could I not be in the moment? After the moments, after things are quiet and I'm left to my thoughts I realize many times that I was forward-thinking. "Oh! I never lit the candles!" "Oh! If I were a size or so smaller I could have worn that cute outfit!" "Oh! What is the next hilarious thing I want to say?"

Yesterday I watched my little tater-tot while his parents attended a memorial service for Bella's grandma. I know I could have gone - that great woman had been my mother-in-law for 23 years - but for some reason I did not feel right about it. There were a few logistic reasons I couldn't go, but nothing that I couldn't have figured out. But when Bella asked if I would watch baby KD while they attended the service, I jumped at the chance. Even though she said the other Granny could watch him if I wanted to attend the service.

I said, "No, please, I'll watch the sweet baby."

So KD and I hung out for four hours or so. And I practiced being in the moment. Because everything stops when you look at your first grandchild's face. Everything! It's fantastic. He and I talked about his Great-Grandmomma and how perfect it had been that he got to meet her and how she loved him and was happy for his parents. How blessed he is to have so many people love him.

He listened to every silly thing I said to him. He's a rapt participant right now. He fills me with tears and joy.

Bella said her dad wrote something that she read for him. He talked about the bond between mother and child. How he saw it when he and I had children and now he's seeing it with his own Bella. And how his momma had that bond with her children.

I will think about momma-Sylvia and how she loved her children and how she loved her grandchildren and how she loved her great-grandchildren. It's New Year's Eve and all things are there for us.

Giving Those Loving Gestures

Getting the trees!

Little K (the Baby-Doll) is our beyond-blessing for the year. The year has been full of blessings and I sometimes can't believe how blessed we are. Then I think how we might just deserve our blessings. And why not?

I was at happy hour the other day and I was speaking to a friend. She mentioned something I had done for Pup when she was with us. It was something I did during dinner to make his experience better. Pup is a picky eater and sometimes I ignore his wants, sometimes I cater to his wants, and sometimes I help. I can't worry about him and what he will or won't eat all the time because his eating limits do make me insane, but I love him.

She said she would have wanted to get angry or smack him or get disgusted. I could tell that she thought my helping him in that moment was something she would never do. While she was telling me this I felt a flash of shame. Was what I had done a weakness on my part? Did it make Pup look weak? Was it less than perfect (something I apparently worry about all the time)?

It didn't hit me until days later that what I had done was a loving gesture. That's all. Just a simple, loving gesture. Done in the moment. Only because I love him. It was a good thing. Nothing for me to think twice about. 

Loving gestures. I want to give more of them. To those I love. Not worry how it makes me look. If loving someone and wanting to make something more comfortable in a moment is weak, then I'm wanting to be the weakest!

I see that today. I wish I had seen it then and always.

I will be watching for opportunities to give loving gestures. And why not? It takes nothing away from me and might make me happier.

Merry Christmas my hooches! Are you ready for your own loving gestures?

Be Thankful, Even for the Mess

Thanksgiving came and went. Pup and I watched movies yesterday nearly non-stop. Some of the mess from the previous days activities still hanging around in The Big Room. It really looked so lovely at the beginning of the day Thursday.

But I didn't take any photos.

"Momma! You haven't taken any photos today." My Bella said at the end of the day.

I was in the kitchen mostly. In the kitchen doing a bit of damage control. My friend AB was helping me thank god and thank you AB. The aftermath of a big meal is sometimes horrendous! I walk in there and think, "F- it. I'm moving." Mostly because I just don't know where to start.

But you do. Start that is. And it gets cleaned up. I'm kinda getting why my own momma was tiring of having holidays after a while. So much work. And it feels, just a little bit, like no one cares.

It made me cranky. Not thankful. Kinda bitchy. "Vicious!" Pup always says. He loves a vicious-woman he says. I know he doesn't really think I'm vicious. But I am cranky.

So, pour me a drink and I'll clean the damn kitchen. Bah!

:)

This little dude was there making everything worth it.

Yes, he really is that beautiful.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pup and I are starting to poke around for something on a lake or river. Just a little chunk of something. For later. For now. No, despite my exclamation up there ^ we are not moving. I just like to kvetch.

Because I have to embrace all that I am. And right now I'm whining.

I'm also tired of the kinda Facebook life everyone is leading. You know what I mean; either everyone is perfect and happy and never needing to clean their house or a shower or they're politicking, passive-agressiving (which I am the queen of), leaving cryptic "words of wisdom" all over the f-ing place, or simply saying stupid stuff. Oh, I do it too! Don't let me get away with pretending I don't! That place is kinda a swamp. The smart ones lurk and sit down.

I'm not really this vicious in real life. I just like to play one on the internet.

indulging my vintage in my office

I do think I worry too much about what is right and what is thought. Yesterday I was poking around at one of my favorite poke-around shops and I was feeling pressured by a few people behind me that were wanting to be standing where I was standing. Sometimes, most times, I might move to let them in. Yesterday I widened my stance, shot one of them a small smile, and finished my browsing in the section I was in.

I felt amazing. Not aggressive. Not bitchy. I just felt empowered for a minute. There are ways to be effective without being bitchy Deborah.

Whooooo ya!

It's day three of the long weekend. What are you doing today?

You Belong to Me

We are on high alert right now waiting for our Baby-Doll, grandchild. It could be any minute.

ANY MINUTE

The thought that I could be singing like this with our new little Tater Tot soon is overwhelming. Yeah I know I don't play the ukulele, but is that important? Hmm?  ;)

Meanwhile, enjoy this. It's just about the cutest thing I've seen in weeks.

Shower Her with Love

Bella and her Grandma

My daughter, Lorenzo, and I hosted a baby shower for the Baby-Doll at my house last weekend. Barnabee jetted off back home on Thursday (her son came to Minnesota to accompany them on the plane - so nice!) and I have talked to my dad a time or two since they arrived home. He sounds so tired. Now that he's back home I am trying to not worry about what is going to happen next. I have no control over that so . . . so . . . I don't know what! I'll think about that later Miss Scarlett.

So the Baby-Doll shower. Thursday evening, after Pup and I drove Barnabee to the airport where I nearly lost their luggage, (that's another story for another day) Lorenzo and I braved the huge and efficient Costco and Party City for shower food and fun.

Friday evening Bella came over to help me clean Chez Emerson (lovely girls I have) and watching her work around her growing belly just fills my heart with unbelievable joy. I am seriously in love with this baby. It's a little scary. I'm going to relish being a Gigi. Whoooha! Love love love - all you need is love.

On Saturday morning Lorenzo and Bella came early to help set up. Lorenzo came bearing little naked-baby ice cubes (omg - so adorable we were dying), makings for mimosas, and a million other things. (I could tell the story of the adorable RM - Lorenzo's boy - having to come not once, but twice to our house bringing things forgotten, but let's leave it that he's an amazing man and good in a pinch. You have to love a man that will be there for you even though he'd rather not. Smooches to RM)

Lorenzo is a very linear thinker. Thank god. I'm a very randomized thinker. Thank god again. Bella is very diplomatic. God is good to me.

Between all of us things got done although at one point while I was hunting down tiny scissors for a shower project I heard Lorenzo exclaim, "Where is she now??" I have always wished my brain worked in a predictable way, but it doesn't. I weave and bob rather than march along. Very, very easily distracted. I think this feeds my creativity. I like this explanation much more than any other that could explain my brain. Ha! I am laughing! Thank you God, yet again.

The shower invitees were my family, Bella's in-laws, my wasband's family including his wife, Pup's family, all my friends that have known Bella - new and old. Yes, we did it all in a swoop. My longtime and lovely friend Reechie thought me insane. I told her, "It will work. It will." And it did.

I didn't get a photo of it, but at one point, both of my mother-in-laws were sitting in a large chair together and I couldn't resist saying, "Both of my momma-in-laws are here!" If this makes anyone uncomfortable I'm sorry. The two of them looked happy. I hope they were.

And even though I did shush one of my sister-in-laws (oh I am such a pain in the ass) the afternoon went well. Bella received lots of lovely things for the Baby-Doll, we ate really good, and it was fun to see people that I haven't seen in ages.

Only one person from my family came and that was a wonderful surprise for all of us. My lovely, lovely niece (my brother's daughter) and her two gorgeous and energetic daughters. That meant a lot to Bella and to me that she came. It couldn't have been comfortable for her and I love it that she put that aside.

After the shower, my friends Deb-oh-rah, Shelley-belly, Teri (Bella's godmother), and wasband's wife stayed along with both of my girls. We sat in the living room talking like girls talk and the laughing and stories were endless entertainment for Pup who pretended to hide in the office "working".

We suddenly looked up and saw that it was 10:30! The shower had started at 2:00. I got a note from Teri a day or two later stating that it was not only the most fun shower she has ever attended, but the longest as well. Ha!

I am blessed.

What Happens at Gigi's, Stays at Gigi's

I love how sometimes I click in here, the empty "new post" page - white, blank, and waiting for me to fill it with my words; but I have NO IDEA what I want to say.

Many times during the day, I'll have a stray thought. A thought about how I feel or a thought about an idea or a thought about a rant. I think, "You should jot that down. Write about it later." Then I don't. The thought runs away. Typical!

Like right now! Nothing in particular I want to say. Or plenty I want to say, but can't settle in and do it.

Random Thoughts

• Run and see Iron Man. Robert Downey Jr is so adorable you want to put his little nugget body in your pocket and keep him with you forever. The movie is wonderful. I love this franchise!
• I also loved Oblivion. I don't want to put Tom Cruise in my pocket though. But I did enjoy this movie. It was unexpectedly sweet and sometimes Sci Fi really floats it for me. Not always. This time it did.
• Parts of southern Minnesota got over 17 inches of snow last week. It snowed here in the cities, but we missed that kind of accumulation. That makes me happy.
• Yesterday, even though I was working in the home office on a deadline, the warm air and sun outside was making me very very happy.
• My daughter Bella is having a baby. This is not a random thought, but it randomly sprints into my brain at least 20 times a day. A baby! Baby baby baby. I cry about it all the time. Tears squirting out that contain my joy.
• My grandma name is Gigi. Thank you to all the southern grandmas that use that name and who ever knew that I'd be thanking The Tumbler for learning about that particular grandma name. One bright spot among a couple from the experience of working there. Gigi is perfect. I used to be known as G.G. - the Graphics Goddess - at my corporate job by a few people. I'm taking it!
• Bella said I should be Glamma. We stole that phrase from Goldie Hawn years before one of the Housewives started using it! I kinda love Glamma as well.
• On this kick - I am trying like HELL to not be annoying with my Bella. I want to touch her belly all the time and I have to curb all my intentions to pummel her with information. Take a breath and sit down Deborah. Done.

See? The random thoughts turned into an announcement. Our family will soon be enjoying fighting over a baby. Pup and I are winning. I am the momma's momma. Who can argue with that?

Ebb and flow today my hooches. Gigi is in the house.