Thursday, May 30, 2013

Maybe I Am a Douchebag

Before I start . . . I heard the other day that Kelly Osborn of Fashion Police and Ozzy made mention (probably tweeted) that she wanted kids, but didn't want a flappy vagina. What the hell . . . doesn't she know that the vagina is the world's greatest elastic? Go to biology class Kelly. You douchebag . . .

On to my douchebaggeryness.

I'm in the middle of a pickle. Funny - pickles are made with vinegar - real douche bags are filled with vinegar sometimes. Hmm . . . the silence you are hearing is me thinking . . .

Back to my pickle.

Before I begin; can a woman be a douchebag? Maybe I should be going with asshole? Hmm . . . yet another thing to slow the process down with my thinking. We can't have that. Aha.

Again, the pickle

I'm in a tussle with a woman in my life. A woman in a leadership position. A woman who could be one of the women we think about and say, "She's a leader. She fosters communication. She delegates tasks with authority and clarity." Or maybe I'm the only one that wants to state things like this about women in authority.

Before I go any farther - I have no desire to be a woman in authority. I've known this all my life. I'm totally cool with this. I like being the workings behind the machine. It's how I am. So my intent is never to BE the woman in charge. But I have worked for many fantastic women in charge. Women that showed grace under fire and had the ability to nurture abilities rather than feel threatened by abilities.

This woman in a leadership position hired me to do some design work for her company. Our interactions have been puzzling.

My first meeting with her I brought a project I had been working on with one of her teammates. She took a cursory look and tossed it on her desk. Dismissed! I thought to myself, Well, let's listen to what she has to say about it. She had nothing to say. She was only dismissive.

And so it began. Ignored emails. Phone meetings set up and ignored by her. Criticism about the "verbiage" I used, yet I experienced her using it in other pieces. Proofs sent, call to action requested, and no reply.

This situation is working my nerves. I am using it as a test. A test to see just how I can contain my douchebaggeryness. I respond to emails slowly; I reread them to make certain I have let no hidden douchey get through. She discovers a kernel of douche and pounces. I respond. I'm frazzled.

Here is why I'm even talking about this today. Here is what I do not understand about my own gender. This will sound douchy to the max, but it is my experience. As my smart husband says, "your experience is reality." This doesn't mean it's right, just that it is right as YOU SEE IT.

Again, I do not understand why my own people, women, battle against each other. We fight about men, we fight about talent, we fight about situations. I'm sick. Sick sick sick. Let's allow each woman in our life to OWN their shit. Good shit and bad shit. Arg!

Let's foster ability. Let's foster a good job. Let's foster everything. Attractiveness, smarts, funny, mothering, creative, and every other damn thing I'm not remembering in my writing sprint here.

Be a douchebag if you must, but be a douchebag with vision.

That is all.

Sunday, May 26, 2013

What's on My Samsung?

I'm annoyed.

I cannot understand why so much energy from everywhere is being focused on one murder trial. I don't understand why so many are giving this horrible situation even one minute of their precious time or why they are drawing more attention to it.

From California to New York there are trials going on. For horrendous crimes. Murders, rapes, arson, robberies. Things that some of us can't even imagine because they are so horrific.

I'll make the one change that I'm in control of. Me. Sometimes I'm not even in control of her! Meaning me. Or whatever the hell I'm trying to say. You know, be the change you want to see and all that crap.

Ha! The most repeated and quoted things are that way for a reason.

So . . .

Wednesday, May 15, 2013


Oh Hell Yes!

It's a done deal. How proud am I to be living in this state? Never will I hear a story from my state like the story my auntie has. Over 25 years with her partner, yet wasn't considered part of the "family" when her partner became ill. This.will.never.happen.again.

Because who doesn't love love?

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Lick Your Lips for Me

. . . here is a random shopping find. I am always on the hunt for lipstick. I recently bought a lovely red Revlon lipstick after seeing Lorenzo wearing a red. I bought more of a blue red and although I love it, I've decided that when you are a woman of a wonderful age, which means not a 20 something, 30 something, or more, red lipstick thins the lips. I've seen it millions of times. Anything a bit too dark makes those lips look just like two skinny slashes of red and seems to make your skin look less than lustrous.

BTW - Revlon makes GREAT lipsticks. They all are wonderful. Makes you kissable.

I found what seems to be so far the perfect shade. It is incredible to many, if not all, skin tones. It makes my blue eyes POP! I mean they leap off my face.

Okay - they really don't, but this lipstick is great. The color is Revlon's Pink Truffle. It's not drying and revitalizes nicely when you apply a gloss over it later. Or just reapply. I like a little bit of a wetter look now and then so I gloss over it. And it is great on its own.
My little tip from me to you. Not that you asked, but I do love to give.  ;)

One little random shot from the other fun night with my friend, Reechie. We played Bingo at Stanley's in Northeast Minneapolis. We were losers, but not really. A perfect evening with my perfect friend.
Rock your lipstick today hooches. All the shades. 

Monday, May 13, 2013

Yesterday Was Momma's Day

My Momma's Day present. I love anything in threes. As I said yesterday when given this beautiful necklace, "My family is much bigger than three, but two perfect girls came from me and that makes three." I might be mangling that exact memory, but this is what I meant. We are three women. Once they were two babies. This isn't better than that, but I sure love this. Love them. Hard. I love them hard.

When I was a young momma and my girls were small, the most wonderful gift I could imagine for momma's day would have been a day away from their wonderful little selves. Only because I was a stay at home momma for many years and it just always sounded heavenly. A day or two away, all alone, with a pile of books, and no agenda.

Now, the best momma's day is spending time with them. And their boys. I just love them so much! Sheesh I'm annoying today!

So - great momma's day. We grilled even though it was a bit brisk outside. Which meant we hung inside instead of out with my new deck furniture. That's okay. Summer is coming. It really is.

This week we all are preparing to go on vacation together. All six of us. Pup, me, Bella, her Big B, Lorenzo, and her RM. I need to settle on RM's nickname! I've had BT and now RM - decide!

Mexico is calling our name.

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

What Happens at Gigi's, Stays at Gigi's

I love how sometimes I click in here, the empty "new post" page - white, blank, and waiting for me to fill it with my words; but I have NO IDEA what I want to say.

Many times during the day, I'll have a stray thought. A thought about how I feel or a thought about an idea or a thought about a rant. I think, "You should jot that down. Write about it later." Then I don't. The thought runs away. Typical!

Like right now! Nothing in particular I want to say. Or plenty I want to say, but can't settle in and do it.

Random Thoughts
  • Run and see Iron Man. Robert Downey Jr is so adorable you want to put his little nugget body in your pocket and keep him with you forever. The movie is wonderful. I love this franchise!
  • I also loved Oblivion. I don't want to put Tom Cruise in my pocket though. But I did enjoy this movie. It was unexpectedly sweet and sometimes Sci Fi really floats it for me. Not always. This time it did.
  • Parts of southern Minnesota got over 17 inches of snow last week. It snowed here in the cities, but we missed that kind of accumulation. That makes me happy.
  • Yesterday, even though I was working in the home office on a deadline, the warm air and sun outside was making me very very happy.
  • My daughter Bella is having a baby. This is not a random thought, but it randomly sprints into my brain at least 20 times a day. A baby! Baby baby baby. I cry about it all the time. Tears squirting out that contain my joy.
  • My grandma name is Gigi. Thank you to all the southern grandmas that use that name and who ever knew that I'd be thanking The Tumbler for learning about that particular grandma name. One bright spot among a couple from the experience of working there. Gigi is perfect. I used to be known as G.G. - the Graphics Goddess - at my corporate job by a few people. I'm taking it!
  • Bella said I should be Glamma. We stole that phrase from Goldie Hawn years before one of the Housewives started using it! I kinda love Glamma as well.
  • On this kick - I am trying like HELL to not be annoying with my Bella. I want to touch her belly all the time and I have to curb all my intentions to pummel her with information. Take a breath and sit down Deborah. Done.
See? The random thoughts turned into an announcement. Our family will soon be enjoying fighting over a baby. Pup and I are winning. I am the momma's momma. Who can argue with that?

Ebb and flow today my hooches. Gigi is in the house.

Friday, May 3, 2013