Awards

Me, winning an award, really, yes, that's me. Don't make me hurt you.

I received the Going Places award from You're Lucky I Don't Have a Gun over at Things I Like to Eat. This girl is so sassy and funny that I am profoundly sad when there hasn't been a post for a few days. And we share a love for atomic dishware. I believe I could have given birth to her in a parallel universe.

The award stipulates stating where I would like to find myself in ten years.

Ten years? Will I still be alive? :)

Hopefully I'll have a job by then. And maybe a wee grandbaby or two. I hope I'm still driving Ruby, my Wrangler, driving Pup crazy, laughing at crazy crap, trying to be open-minded, and able to tell a story.


I also received the Blog with Substance award from the lovely and talented J.J. from over at The World According to J.J.

Again, check out her writings. She is just the kind of smart aleck that creeps into your heart and makes you glad you're a reader.

For this award I'm to sum up my blogging philosophy, motivation, and experience using five words.

Really? Five words? This could be tough. Especially since I haven't been very sassy myself for a while. Summer delight is sucking all the profound right out of me. I'm stuffed with sunny warmness and no angst. Ha!

So, here goes; my five words:

expressive
silly
cathartic
eye-opening
cool


Thanks also to Marla over at Butts and Ashes. She also gifted me with the ten years assignment, but no button to share. Just her delightful blog. Read her! Obey me!

Thank you, my fellow bloggers, for your nods of appreciation my way. It means more than I can express.

Quote

Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right.
~Henry Ford

Don't You Wish You Could Sleep Like This?

Calvin was demanding equal time. I didn't want to get slapped with a union grievance. Wuss!

Real reason - playing with my YouTube and my camera settings.

Hot Men Friday

I am feeling all cornball again. What is up with that?

Heard an interview on the radio with Burton Cummings the other day. He was promoting a new album and I think they were talking about how he hadn't made an album in 20 years.

American Woman
These Eyes
No Time
No Sugar Tonight
Undun
Laughing

I must have seen these guys over a dozen times in concert. I went to see Burton Cummings on his own as well. Back in his porn mustache and white suit (alá Saturday Night Fever) days. Had, of course, the HUGEST rock-crush on him.


I was checking out his Twitter account and he sounds like he may have done just a little too much creative medication over these long rock-studded years. Or maybe he's just that deep (really?). Doesn't it seem that many super-creatives are living on the end of crazy-town? I like that. Keeps the world interesting.

Lenny can suck it. Turn this one up.

George Goes to the Vet

Guest Blogger - George
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's morning, the sun is shining, I'm happy as that dog licking his balls that my owner is always talking about. Oh wait . . . I don't have balls. BALLS!

Oh oh. She's attaching the leash in the car. This could mean a few things. She could be taking me to Wagner's Drive-In, she could be taking me to the dog park, she could be taking me to the groomers, or she could be taking me to the vet! BALLS!

Maybe if I stare at Pup's car long enough he'll come rescue me. Nothing bad EVER happens to me when Pup's around. Oh wait . . . Pup drove his little car! BALLS!

May as well settle down and get comfy. She drives like a maniac and I should keep my head down in case of flying expletives. BALLS!

Oh - this is good. She knows just how to rub my neck. Okay, I kinda like her. Even when she brings me here. BALLS!

Oh dear! Who the heck is that?? Arrrg! This can't be good! They're probably going to tell me how adorable I am and weigh me and stick this thing in my neck and call it a "shot" and take blood. Oh the inhumanity! Wait . . . I'm a dog. I keep forgetting.

Oh the incaninity of it! BALLS!

Really? We're done? Keep your damn low-fat treat. I'm going home. I'm going to roll in the grass and drink water. I'm going to listen to everything she ever says to me from now on. I'll never go out of an open gate again. I'll never jump on delivery guys and scare the living crap out of them. I promise! BALLS!



My screen debut. And her first, ahem, attempt to video my cuteness. And it's about BALLS!

Sick Mac

Sad sac mac.

Yes, there are thousands of PCs in this house, (that may be a slight exaggeration) but when your one and only is on the fritz nothing is the same.

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone.

Can't get to my STUFF peeps! MY STUFF! All my important stuff!

Ironically, Pup's PCs are sick on a daily basis. My mac - NEVER!

Send me good thoughts; even if you hate Macs. Which I'm guessing some of you do because that's just how it goes. And when people hate Macs they ALWAYS have to tell me.

That's okay. We can take it.

:D

I'm armed and diverting - uh, I mean, dangerous.

I Miss Amy Winehouse

The lovely Amy before all the crazy.

Yes, I've seen all the photos. Seen her idiocy splashed across the internet like a spilled cocktail. Yes I know she's just this side of crack-crack-crazy. But watch this little video and tell me that isn't talent.

Amy Winehouse - Valerie

I selfishly want her to get better and healthy so I can have a new CD from her. My daughter, Lorenzo, mentioned that she heard a new CD is coming out soon and I, for one, am waiting excitedly.

That's Me All Over

Alex Noriega

Scarecrow: they took my legs off and they threw them over there! Then they took my chest out and they threw it over there!
Tin Woodsman: Well, that's you all over!

• Organizer
• Manager
• Web designer
• Decorator
• Gardner
• Cook
• Drinker
• Knitter
• Reader
• Writer
• Remodeler

Knock-knock
Who's there?
I don't know.
I don't know who?
I told you! I don't know!

A few (truthfully? More than a few) years ago I owned a consignment store. Can I say it was the best job I ever had? Can I say I enjoyed it more than Schwan's Rocky Road ice cream? Can I say I worked harder longer and better than I ever had before or after? And the hours FLEW by in that little store. It NEVER felt like work.

I loved all aspects of that store. The managing, the styling, the merchandising, the procurement, even the bookkeeping.

It was a place where I had a few women that shopped with me regularly. A place where a few women would come to me for styling advice. At times the tiny store floor would be all twirly with women trying on clothes and showing all of us how gorgeous they were. I saw my first tramp-stamp in that store.

Once, a couple was inspired to get very very "busy" in my one dressing room!

I even dressed a man as a woman for a party. He said he felt so pretty! Ha!

My girls helped me out in the store, I was right in the community where we lived and they went to school.

That was the best feeling. That moment, that time, the very best.

What is your fulfillment? What knocks off your socks?

Overheard

Overheard while at the Target.

Deborah, could you please help me unload this cart?

A mom to her little girl. The little girl was about nine. Nine! You just don't see my name out there any more. Kinda went by the wayside like Ethyl or Mabel.

I confess, I totally swung my head around 'cuz I thought she was talking to me.

Hot Men Friday

Interesting week! And my birthday week. And Pup's and my first anniversary. See what I mean?

U.S. Open

Pebble Beach

It's father's day! What could be better than watching some golf?

Ryo Ishikawa

This kid is fun to watch. He's bringing great hair on the golf course as well.

Tiger Woods

Tiger might be the one to watch today. He was brilliant yesterday.

Dustin Johnson

The leader going into today. He is 25 years old!

Graeme McDowell

This is the guy I'm pulling for.

Pup and I are going to start the day hitting some balls. He's good, I'm not. I'll try to channel some Philly-Dog while I'm swinging.

State of Confusion

When I was a kid my dad had a sweatshirt that he would wear camping. It was black and written on the front in all white caps was the phrase "State of Confusion."

It was the 70s and we were camping in a gorgeous place way up north that I cannot for the life of me remember the name of. I coveted that sweatshirt. I loved that my dad wore it with no sense of the irony it conveyed. Or maybe he only had it because it was cold on this particular trip and they sold the sweatshirt in the giftshop. I don't know!

Oh wait! I just thought of the name of the area we were camping. Kabetogama Lake! Such a gorgeous place. I remember visiting this crazy island where a man had been making rock sculptures for 30 some years and letting people come, if they dared on the big lake, and visit.

We had a largish red wooden boat and I remember it feeling so very tiny when we were out on that lake. Scary and thrilling at the same time.

I believe I was in the middle of some teenage angst at the time and had all these thoughts and drama in my head that entire trip. Did lots of sighing because I just knew I'd 'die' if I didn't get home to my boyfriend. Don't you just love teenage angst? You think no one has ever gone through anything like you are experiencing. How could they? Ha!

The State of Confusion. I need to get me a sweatshirt.

Hot Men Friday

The Tudors is over.

[stomping foot] NO NO NO!

Okay, it's really time now for summer to kick in. It's time for Mojitos, Hendrick's gin with cucumbers, maybe finally drinking that Blue Moon beer that is in my fridge, and grilling every day.

Quote

Each moment is the fruit of forty thousand years. The minute-winning days, like flies, buzz home to death, and every moment is a window on all time. This is a moment.

—Thomas Wolfe
Look Homeward, Angel

The Solution!

I was recently helping one of my sil's (shout out to Penny Lane!) get some items ready for a benefit auction she was heading up. So while we were wandering about in The Dollar Tree and while I was looking for some suitable cutie stuffed animals for one of the baskets, I found these:
The idea is the pink one is for Pup to select something and the blue one is for me to select something. Something we want the other to do.

For instance, on the blue doll there is one that says "pick up your clothes" or "rub my feet."
On the pink doll there is one that says "no more purses" (like that's going to happen - ha!) or back rub.
We've been having the BEST time with these the past couple of days.

I'll find the pink one on my office chair - "dishes don't do themselves" selected. I snort. He laughs. It's awesome!

I'll place the blue one in his cookie jar - "wash the dishes" selected. He snorts. I laugh. Brilliant!

The only drawback. I need additional choices. Something like.

Let's run away to Mexico forever

Let's go shopping

Let me decorate the house only the way I want. (teasin')

Stop jiggling my butt

Let's be happy forever

You see where I'm going?

What would be on your request doll?

Just for the Hell of It

This shot simply makes me laugh. Both daughter Lorenzo and dog George looked possessed.

Those two generally don't get along all that well. He jumps on her at times and sticks his nose where she'd rather he didn't. She's always hollering, "George! Get away from me"!

Once last year George got out of the yard and when she and I found out we ran to Ruby (my jeep) to start looking for him. Lauren is crying pretty hard and stutters, "I don't even like him that much, but we have to find him"!

Ha!

George is rather irresistible that way.

Eames and Shoots

My dream recliner, not the one we bought.

We are redecorating our living room. Slowly, but surely, getting the bits and pieces we need.

It started a couple of months ago while we were watching Breaking Bad and Pup was squirming away on his end of the sectional.

"Babe, I miss my recliners," he said.

"You mean from the white marshmallow couch," I said? (Retired into pieces in various rooms.)

"A man needs his recliners."

I looked over at him. At his big-manness and his uncomfortable repose.

"Can we look for a recliner that doesn't lose small children and pets in its cushions? One that is a bit sleeker for my eyes," I say?

Does a hockey player wear a nutcup?

So, I was off on my hunt for the perfect recliner.

Found one, we ordered it, it took WEEKS to be delivered. It was a pile. A sorry pile. When Pup sat in it we could just tell it wouldn't last through football season.

sigh

Back it went with a bit of whining from me to the customer service team that guys that like recliners generally don't weigh 150 pounds and what was the point of a dainty recliner? She didn't laugh.

So, off the two of us go to find the perfect recliner.

We trotted off to furniture stores. Many furniture stores. We were getting crabby. The chairs he was loving were so very very POOFY. Large smushy arms perfect for resting snacks on. Large squishy seats for napping.

The chairs I was loving were not right.

"Oh look baby"! He has spotted something.

"This one has CUP HOLDERS right in the arms"! His eyes were shining with happiness. He was immediately reclined in the cupholder-chair and dangerously close to nodding off. Or was I dangerously close to bumping him off? Kidding . . . I think.

"Oh my friggin' god Pup! I can't have furniture with CUPHOLDERS! You want to turn our living room into an SUV"!

A standoff.

He's Pup-pouting. I'm pouting. We're now beyond crabby.

Again I say, "You need a man-den." It's true. Our house is just one little room too small.

So, off to chi-chi furniture store, where I, of course, find a perfect chair. In my eyes. Pup isn't seeing it that way.

"Babe, it's $2,300. I am not paying $2,300 for a RECLINER"!

"Sweetie, furniture costs money."

"The cupholder chair was only $1000"!

I stare at him with guns in my eyes.

Smarmy salesman runs over with leather samples. Oblivious to the malevolence snapping in the air like lightening.

So, off we go to another furniture store. Where, a few weeks ago, we had found the perfect couch with no arguing. And where a few recliners had been rejected outright by both of us.

We walk around the store, tired and CRABBY.

Pup remembers a chair that he rejected back then. He pulls me like an unruly child to the recliner.

We both stand there looking at it. Why had it been rejected before? It's great. We can pick our leather. And get this . . .

we both fit in it! We can watch and recline together. Or he can recline alone in man-glory.

I'm as happy as a dog licking his balls.

Hot Men Friday

Um, yeah . . .

Love dark and brooding.

And, btw, if you get a chance to see the movie City Island I wholeheartedly recommend it. Surprisingly engaging and interesting.

Words I Love

shenanigans

brilliant

boner

obdurate

Jeep

wiener

empanada

mojito

daughters

organized

daisy

seduce

sale

published

crapinoli

art

arse

thick
What are your favorites?

Intentions

I had every intention . . .

of making my bed

of exercising today

of not eating that fourth empanada

of making that call

of walking George

of taking my vitamins

of swapping out my seasonal clothes

of shaving my legs

of drinking my eight glasses of water

of making a new plan Stan

of getting on the bus Gus

of putting on a happy face


Yes, I have been known to wallow in it a bit. It's my Cancerian nature I've been told. And who doesn't like to wallow just a teeny bit from time to time?

It's not pleasant. I caught a glimpse of my face in a store mirror the other day when I wasn't expecting it and, hey! Is that me? I look so crabby! Your face is going to stay that way!

When I'm driving I'm looking to pick a fight with other drivers. Really? You want to do that? I can run your ass off the road quicker than I can say dumbass.

What are your intentions?