Friday, April 15, 2011

Hot Men Friday

Brandon Boyd

This pick isn't necessarily because he's that hot - although my daughter has thought him the pinnacle of hotness since a tender age - it's more about daughters and influences from them and loving what they are now, but missing them from how they used to be.

The other night before bed I was reading a few blogs from my stash and read Bella's post about songs and love and read Karen's post about daughters and growing pains.

These somehow meshed and combined in my chaotic mind and made me not be able to stop thinking about Incubus.

Bella was at that age and listening to all of her music-of-her-age. The music that was fueling her growth and change and carving out, just a little bit here, the woman she was going to be.

I was listening too. By default I'll admit. Some of it was CRAZY. I never never did get KORN  - brrrrg! But I kept hearing this particular band that she loved. The singer could SING, the songs were well-written. I would find myself singing along when she would play them.

If this bugged her, she hid it well. Who wants their MOMMA liking or finding interest in something you are using for your revolution? I exaggerate, but I do remember worrying about that just a tad.

Because I fell in LOVE with Incubus. Seriously. Embarrassingly. Who listened to them that was over 25 at the time?

I bought a few CDs and during my 1.5 to 2 hours on the road every day (long commute back then) I listened to them over and over. Bellowing along day after day to Favorite Things and You Will Be a Hot Dancer and Summer Romance. That last one got played and sang to a million times. At least. One reason I like to commute alone.

I loved them so much that when Bella and her gang decided to go see Incubus, Taproot, Papa Roach, and the Deftones at the Roy Wilkins Auditorium in Minneapolis, I begged to tag along.

Bella and her friends were in high school and we decided to meet at the concert since all of them were driving from our home north of the cities while I was already there since I worked in the cities.

While walking alone through the skyways to get to Roy Wilkins, I ran into the owners of the corporation I worked for at the time. K and L were resplendent in a mink and a tux, dressed for an evening event.

"Where are you heading Deborah"? K asked me. I remember looking at her in her gorgeousness for a beat and wondering what she and L would think if I told them I was heading over to a mosh pit to hang with a bunch of 17 year-olds. I kept that info to myself and said I was meeting friends. Ha!

I approached the gate waving my ticket at the young security guard that was merrily frisking people and checking bags. There I stood in my black pencil skirt, button-down blue blouse, heels, and pearls, carrying my black Coach handbag.

The young 'un took one look at me and shook his head in the negative and said out loud, "Oh hell no"! meaning he would NOT be frisking this mom nor manhandling her bag or anything else on her person.

I breezed in and quickly discovered something.

I found my seat and pulled out my cell phone to call my friend Reechie.

"What am I going to do? There is no one in this room over the age of 30 except for me. And I'm more than a little bit over 30. I feel like this is crazy!"

Reechie just kept laughing at me and thanking God that it wasn't her.

The kids arrived and pulled straws to see who would get stuck sitting near me. I'm only half kidding.

It was loud, smokey, intense, awesome.

Our seats were in the first row just above the mosh pit. Bella had graciously not gotten floor tickets so I wouldn't have to handle that, but I could tell that the group was wishing that they were out there with all the body surfing and jumping from the stage into the crowd that was going on.

Once every so often the floor would open up and we'd be watching two or more people pushing and shoving each other. I kinda forget what that was called. I actually have forgotten much of the evening I was so high from the pot I was breathing in.

Incubus was amazing. I loved loved loved seeing them perform all the stuff I enjoyed and had to stifle myself from singing along with the band. Seriously amazing.

Okay, maybe I didn't stifle myself that carefully, but in my head I was behaving. Bella reminded me just today of something I did to the poor lead singer of the opening band that dared to walk in front of us. I plead no memory of this event. Do you believe me?

After Incubus was done there were one or two more bands that were going to perform, but I was high, tired, my head was pounding, and I was really starting to feel out of place.

I said my goodbyes even though they begged me to stay (uh huh! lol) and burst out of the doors into blinding light only to bump directly into someone.

It was a man. A grown man. A man my age.

We took one look at each other, panting, sweating, not 17, and burst out laughing! He couldn't wait to get out either.

I drove home overly carefully - listening to Incubus all the way.

Once in my kitchen I proceeded to devour the entire contents of my fridge. Heh!

What an unselfish girl to let her momma go with her and her friends. I knew right then that Bella had the most generous spirit. Even while trying to figure out who she was.

Drive my darling. Drive.


Sarah said...

This made me tear up!

You have great taste in music and I'm just happy that I was able to influence you a little in return, since you were responsible for me loving Pearl Jam, Stone Temple Pilots, Smashing Pumpkins, and Jane's Addiction (among others).

Although it drove me nuts when I'd play a song for you and then you'd whip out the album that had the ORIGINAL song (Low Rider? Mellow Yellow?) Ha ha!

All the time, I think about how lucky I am that the household I grew up in was full of music lovers and encouraged the exploration and enjoyment of music (even if we didn't always see eye to eye with our choices).

I appreciated the fact that although I listened to some "scary" music (Marilyn Manson) you always took the time to look into it yourself and make your own opinions about it and not believe all the negative hype. You were looking out for me as a parent by seeing what I was listening to, but you looked out for me even more by giving me the room to make my own choices and trusting me to make my own decisions about what I was listening to.

And I always loved the fact that my mom liked good music and it wasn't because you were trying to be the "cool mom", it was just who you were!

This is why all of my friends, every single one since I was three years old until the present, has loved you from the moment they met you.

silvergirl said...

Well, I am showing my gray hair here, because I never heard of this dude or band. Maybe because I have boys?
He is a little cutie though.
Both of my sons are very into music
Each into totally different genres and that what makes music so great!

Ms. A said...

The entire contents of the fridge??? You had some serious munchies after breathing all those pot fumes!

PS: You are very brave, too. LOL!

The Empress said...

What a comment from Sarah.

I'...I am left speechless.

Going to read it again, how WONDERFUL.

Sandra said...

This was the perfect post to start off my day and the perfect piece of writing for me to read as I begin navigating the bumpy road of raising a daughter, who is only 11 now, but already full of the need to be her own person.
And...uummm...the munchies eh... :)

David L Macaulay said...

don't ya hate being too old to be frisked, nice post, Deborah - thanx for the blog comments

Shabbygal said...

Debra That was written beautifully! I also got into some of my kids bands they loved I think they would like that better then us disapproving of their choices in music! That was wonderful to read this morning with my coffee! Traci

Deborah said...

Sarah - I love you more than you know.

SG - it's fun having kids right? You learn so much!

Ms A - well, I may have exaggerated. Ha!

Empress - sometimes it has a HUGE payoff. I was floating on air all day after reading Sarah's comment.

Sandra - it can feel like a mine field at times, but you'll do awesome.

David - seriously! He could have helped a mom out, you know?

Traci - thank you so much!

Not So Simply Single said...

Very handsome, but must say that he is again too young for my fierce cougar blood...

Done browsing now....

Glad we have different taste or else we would be fighting over the same guy!

Love ya!