It's been a long and hot summer.
And, as mentioned, I've been wearing nothing but skirts, dresses, tanks. Nothing with legs or sleeves. My happiest days are when I can say, "I'm wearing only two things!" Pup usually says, "Take one off!"
That's how hot it's been. And now it's September. And still pretty hot. And I work retail. Where you're running around. And I'm hot. I just am!
Yesterday morning I had to open at The Turnstyle. I haven't opened in a loooooong time. In fact a lot of this hot summer I wasn't at work at all with all the Barnabee squiring I was involved in (smooches Barnabee).
Before I leave for work I stand in front of my closet. Peering into its depths. There is more in there than needs to be - hey, I'm a woman. But just between you and me? That closet is out of control. No matter how much I edit and purge and ween out crap, it's full full full.
Imagine the sound of hangers being shuttled to the left, click click click. I go deeper and deeper.
Aha! A little black dress. Sleeveless. To the knee. A kick pleat in the back. Price tag still on. WTH?
A woman phenomenon. We buy stuff on sale. My favorite phrase is, "It costs less than a latte!" Nothing makes me happier than a price tag with several strikes through the price making it lower and lower and than it's thrown in a 75 percent off rack. Oh the heaven of it all. Even at The Turnstyle, a consignment store, I love when it's at least 50 percent off.
But I digress, of course.
I clip off the tag. Look lovingly at the price. "Ooooo, that was a good shopping day." I slip on the dress.
I like to turn to the side, suck everything in perfectly, admire my front bumps and back bumps, and convince myself how amazing I look. Hey - it's all presentation. Even when you catch a glimpse of the back bump in motion. Oye vey!
I throw my badly behaved hair up high in a clip, pull out some very artful hangy-pieces (yup - otherwise known as what-the-hell hair) and call it a day.
I trot off to work where new young un interim manager/intern Izzy and Shelley-belly tell me I look just like Audrey Hepburn.
Yup, I look exactly like this, right down to the sunglasses and coffee.
Oh the power of a little black dress! And be quiet y'all. A girl can have a moment yes?
Hooches - repeat after me -
I may not be everything, but I sure am something!
Go get em!